Okay so this is way overdue...but I felt as though I needed to wrap up this blog with some kind of reflection of my time here. Now that I have had time to adapt back into my "home" culture in Boston, I have a new perspective on everything in my life...I'll try to explain.
When I left Peru, I didn’t feel ready to go home. After 6 months of being away, you'd think I'd be dying to get back home to hot showers, "normal" food, and English being the primary language. Not me. It was weird because I talked to a few other students who had been traveling/working abroad from NEU and they all seemed “ready” to return to the “real world”. For me, I felt the opposite. While I was excited to see friends and family, I felt like I was leaving a big part of me behind in South America. I grew up so much while I was there and overcame some of the biggest challenges I feel I have ever encountered. Everything from arriving in Argentina with basically no Spanish, to traveling by myself, making friends in two foreign countries, and adapting to two extremely different cultures…it’s been one hell of an adventure…something I’ll never forget. Everyone says it’s time for me to get “back to reality” but the truth is I can’t wait to get back there… I have never felt so comfortable as I did while I lived there. Everyday I learned something new, whether it was new phrases/words, something about the culture, or something in dance (just a few examples).
I learned to live in the moment. Instead of constantly trying to get something checked off my checklist (I don’t even think I had a checklist in Argentina, besides going to class and my volunteer job and practicing Spanish), I learned to play things by ear. I learned to enjoy the moments where I could develop a relationship with my host family. Mother-daughter talks with Adrianna (my host mom) over mate and empanadas, or hearing Pepe give me advice on latino boys on the days he gave me a ride to work. I miss family dinners, with Mike, my American host brother from North Carolina, my host parents, and our host sister, Jimena. Sitting around the table, laughing about the day, Mike and I practicing our Spanish as best we could, and debating controversial topics. I miss living spontaneously. Leaving to go out on a run, dropping in on my friend who worked in the convenient store up the street, and accepting an invitation to go swim on his lunch break. I miss having time to sit in a café with my British friends, Roxy and Lucy after working in the orphanage, and talking about how lucky we were to have this awesome opportunity in a foreign country. I also miss spending my days off wandering around Cuzco with my friends, seeing where the day would lead us. All those small things are memories I'll never forget.
I learned to let myself grow. I realized that feeling uncomfortable in a situation is okay, because it allows you to learn. I had been in a comfort zone, and a bubble since I was younger… being around the same types of people, doing the same types of things. It wasn’t a bad thing, it was just all I had ever known. Especially growing up in a town like Groton that doesn’t have much diversity. Although I believe it was for the best at the time, because I wasn’t ready to comprehend and handle diversity as well as I can at this age. Moving to Florida last year for my other co-op put me out of my comfort zone in a way that definitely prepared me for going abroad, but my semester abroad has given me the confidence that nothing is impossible, no matter how far out of your comfort zone you might feel.
I also miss the cultures. It is normal for people with reverse culture shock to become critical of their home culture, which I have definitely noticed significantly since I came home. I respect that the culture of the United States is different, but it is so hard for me to come back to this country when I am so used to meeting strangers on the street, becoming friends with my laundry lady, and having daily conversations with the locals that work in the market or in the corner stores. This isn’t uncommon in these cultures, it is normal for them to talk to strangers, and to inquire about their lives, family, and travel. In our culture, if you say hi to a stranger on the street, people are usually (not always) confused or think it’s strange. In Boston, everyone is on a mission, on their way to class, to work, or to get their errands done. People don’t stop to talk for longer then a few minutes (to people that they know) because that’s our culture – we have to be somewhere on time and stick to our schedules.
I miss walking 40 minutes to work in Cuzco, and enjoying the view of the Andes mountains. I miss walking through the plazas, and seeing all the people, both tourists and locals. I never walked with headphones on (for both the reasons that I didn’t want my ipod stolen, and I didn’t want to cut myself off from the world). It was refreshing. In Boston I have the habit of wearing my Ipod to class or to work…but now it doesn’t bother me to walk and just enjoy the sights and sounds around me. I know it sounds corny, but it’s the truth.
I also had my passion for dance re-fired when I was in Peru. It started when I learned how to dance salsa, and it became almost like an addiction..I went and danced salsa every night, and it made me miss dancing at Northeastern. I was inspired to start taking my passion more seriously, and even to start creating and choreographing (still working on that part…step by step). It seems like so many of us get caught up in the mainstream life of going to college (sometimes not even studying something we like), finding a job right out of college that we “fit” into, and continues from there…for some people I think this is fine. But I think for some people they don’t realize that they never did self-discovery, and by the time they turn 30 or 40 they look back and wonder how they ever got to where they are… Maybe I’m crazy but I don’t want to be one of those people. I realize that I’m not always going to be able to do what I want to do in life…sometimes you have to bite the bullet and make sacrifices to follow your dreams and your interests… but I never want to get stuck in a rut in something I don’t like doing.
I have met too many people in my life who have told me to “live in reality” and that my thoughts or dreams weren’t realistic. Maybe it isn’t realistic, but let me worry about that. I would rather have something to work towards, then to accept so-called “reality” and be miserable the rest of my life…
I feel as though I have more to write, but this will have to do for now. Fall semester has started so I’m back on a time-restrictive schedule that doesn’t allow much time for relaxation/things not school or work related :)
Thanks for reading...
I learned how to slow down. I arrived in Argentina a huge planner, someone who needed to have things organized, a routine. I realized pretty quickly that that just wasn’t going to fly in South America. I learned to be okay with waiting for the bus for awhile (sometimes even an hour) and for leaving extra time to get to places on time. I learned that it’s okay to take a nap everyday in the afternoon, because it makes you enjoy the day, and you feel refreshed to enjoy the second half of it.
I learned to live in the moment. Instead of constantly trying to get something checked off my checklist (I don’t even think I had a checklist in Argentina, besides going to class and my volunteer job and practicing Spanish), I learned to play things by ear. I learned to enjoy the moments where I could develop a relationship with my host family. Mother-daughter talks with Adrianna (my host mom) over mate and empanadas, or hearing Pepe give me advice on latino boys on the days he gave me a ride to work. I miss family dinners, with Mike, my American host brother from North Carolina, my host parents, and our host sister, Jimena. Sitting around the table, laughing about the day, Mike and I practicing our Spanish as best we could, and debating controversial topics. I miss living spontaneously. Leaving to go out on a run, dropping in on my friend who worked in the convenient store up the street, and accepting an invitation to go swim on his lunch break. I miss having time to sit in a café with my British friends, Roxy and Lucy after working in the orphanage, and talking about how lucky we were to have this awesome opportunity in a foreign country. I also miss spending my days off wandering around Cuzco with my friends, seeing where the day would lead us. All those small things are memories I'll never forget.
I learned that you might touch people’s lives without even realizing that you made a difference. I know there are so many people I met while I was abroad, including my host family, my local friends, friends from other countries, other American students, random people I met along the way when I was traveling… I have such distinct memories with them all that it’s impossible to write them all down. Thank God for pictures that spark the memories and the funny stories that have happened along the way. I learned to try to be positive about every situation, even though that always didn’t work out :) I learned to deal with all types of people…and learned to deal with conflict (traveling with friends definitely brings up a bit of tension/conflict…)
I learned to let myself grow. I realized that feeling uncomfortable in a situation is okay, because it allows you to learn. I had been in a comfort zone, and a bubble since I was younger… being around the same types of people, doing the same types of things. It wasn’t a bad thing, it was just all I had ever known. Especially growing up in a town like Groton that doesn’t have much diversity. Although I believe it was for the best at the time, because I wasn’t ready to comprehend and handle diversity as well as I can at this age. Moving to Florida last year for my other co-op put me out of my comfort zone in a way that definitely prepared me for going abroad, but my semester abroad has given me the confidence that nothing is impossible, no matter how far out of your comfort zone you might feel.
I also miss the cultures. It is normal for people with reverse culture shock to become critical of their home culture, which I have definitely noticed significantly since I came home. I respect that the culture of the United States is different, but it is so hard for me to come back to this country when I am so used to meeting strangers on the street, becoming friends with my laundry lady, and having daily conversations with the locals that work in the market or in the corner stores. This isn’t uncommon in these cultures, it is normal for them to talk to strangers, and to inquire about their lives, family, and travel. In our culture, if you say hi to a stranger on the street, people are usually (not always) confused or think it’s strange. In Boston, everyone is on a mission, on their way to class, to work, or to get their errands done. People don’t stop to talk for longer then a few minutes (to people that they know) because that’s our culture – we have to be somewhere on time and stick to our schedules.
I miss walking 40 minutes to work in Cuzco, and enjoying the view of the Andes mountains. I miss walking through the plazas, and seeing all the people, both tourists and locals. I never walked with headphones on (for both the reasons that I didn’t want my ipod stolen, and I didn’t want to cut myself off from the world). It was refreshing. In Boston I have the habit of wearing my Ipod to class or to work…but now it doesn’t bother me to walk and just enjoy the sights and sounds around me. I know it sounds corny, but it’s the truth.
I also had my passion for dance re-fired when I was in Peru. It started when I learned how to dance salsa, and it became almost like an addiction..I went and danced salsa every night, and it made me miss dancing at Northeastern. I was inspired to start taking my passion more seriously, and even to start creating and choreographing (still working on that part…step by step). It seems like so many of us get caught up in the mainstream life of going to college (sometimes not even studying something we like), finding a job right out of college that we “fit” into, and continues from there…for some people I think this is fine. But I think for some people they don’t realize that they never did self-discovery, and by the time they turn 30 or 40 they look back and wonder how they ever got to where they are… Maybe I’m crazy but I don’t want to be one of those people. I realize that I’m not always going to be able to do what I want to do in life…sometimes you have to bite the bullet and make sacrifices to follow your dreams and your interests… but I never want to get stuck in a rut in something I don’t like doing.
I have met too many people in my life who have told me to “live in reality” and that my thoughts or dreams weren’t realistic. Maybe it isn’t realistic, but let me worry about that. I would rather have something to work towards, then to accept so-called “reality” and be miserable the rest of my life…
